“A Work In Progress”

Faith Sustains Woman on Her Journey Back to the Church

Five years ago, Peggy Chupka Blann found herself at a crossroads. After years of marriage, Peggy and her husband, Mel, divorced. The court awarded Peggy and Mel joint custody of their sons, ages 1 and 3; Peggy was given primary placement.

Though things were very amicable, Peggy was stunned. “I never thought this would happen to me. I thought my life would go a certain way,” said Peggy. “I never thought I would be divorced.” Peggy had been raised Catholic, attended Catholic grade and high schools in Davenport, Iowa, and been sheltered from the reality of divorce. Now she was a single mother.  

Peggy decided to use the life-altering event as an opportunity to make other changes. Her faith had waned since high school, but now she felt a calling to strengthen it. She knew she wanted to raise her children in a family rooted in faith, and so she and her ex-husband agreed enroll their oldest son, Michael, in a Catholic school.

Peggy wanted her boys to have the same great Catholic education she had, so she and her ex-husband visited a few local Catholic grade schools. Of the schools they toured, St. Mary’s Menomonee Falls impressed them the most and they enrolled Michael. Peggy knew this would not only be a big step for her little guy, but for her as well.

“If I’m going to send my kids to Catholic schools, I’m going to have to talk the talk and walk the walk,” Peggy thought to herself. However, Peggy felt apprehensive becoming more active in the Catholic faith. As much as she wanted to return to her roots and raise her kids in a faith-filled house, she was unsure of how the Catholic Church would view a divorcée. She was concerned about being accepted by the other parishioners. Not knowing anyone else who was divorced, Peggy imagined she would be the only divorced parent. She also wondered if it was acceptable for her to receive Communion now that she was divorced.  

Despite her fears, Peggy got involved at Michael’s school. Fortunate enough to be a stay-at-home mom, she joined the Fun Fair planning committee, helped out in her son’s classroom, art class and computer class.

When her comfort level increased, she joined the women’s Bible study group at the parish. To Peggy’s surprise, the other participants were very welcoming. Further encouraged, she went to the parish office and inquired about an annulment. The woman in the office told her she would need to set up a meeting with the priest. Peggy left the office reassured she still belonged in the Catholic faith, but put off meeting with the pastor about an annulment.

She turned her thoughts back to her children. Inspired by St. Mary School’s motto “Inscribing Jesus on Our Hearts,” which asks Catholics to incorporate Jesus into their lives throughout the day through their words and actions, Peggy made changes at home. She began saying bedtime prayers with her sons, asking them who they wanted to pray for. Sometimes she was surprised by their child-like responses. Her youngest son, Andrew, once decided to pray for himself, while Michael opted to pray for a Nintendo DS. To help keep her children’s prayers relevant, Peggy signed her family up to help at the St. Benedict the Moor meal program through their parish outreach. She also set another goal for her family - attend Mass regularly.

As her involvement with the Church grew, Peggy volunteered to help with the parish’s Faith in Our Future campaign, calling parishioners to explain the campaign and ask if they had prayer intentions. Peggy was inspired by their strong faith, but even more surprised by how the calls affected her, “I went into this trying to find a way that I could help with this campaign and ended up getting so much out of it.”

As Peggy began to feel at ease, the school asked her to write a short newsletter article explaining how her family lived the Covenant. Unsure of what to say, she was suddenly struck by something her priest said at Mass. He was talking about “a work in progress.” When Peggy heard that, she knew that’s what she was – an unfinished work of God. She knew what to write about.

“After I wrote that article, I was dying,” exclaimed Peggy. “There I was, a divorced mom. I wondered what the reaction from others would be.” Shortly after the article was published however, she received responses from others who shared her sentiments - they, too, were works in progress.
Through all of her soul-searching, Peggy realized though her marriage had not been bad; it had been invalid – grounds for an annulment. It had taken five years, but she was finally ready to move forward with the annulment.

This past summer, she met with her priest and started the annulment process. Even though she thought and prayed about her decision, it was still difficult to begin. Gathering witnesses and putting together her reasons for seeking the annulment have been difficult as well. It’s also a work in progress, but Peggy is in a good place.

With both of her sons in school, Peggy has taken on a part-time job at a mortgage company. Michael just made his first reconciliation, and she’s very happy with the Catholic education they are receiving. She’s still working to strengthen her family’s faith, but with two kids, a house and a job, she admits it’s a challenge. Peggy misses some of her Bible study group’s meetings, but she’s been assured she’s always welcome.

“I feel like I am in a very, very good place. I am confident in what I am doing. I had to get to that place where I felt that,” Peggy explains. “After all, I am still a work in progress.”

Article by Gillian Lester-George
Cover photo courtesy of the Blann Family

pictured on cover - The Blanns (Peggy, Michael and Andrew)